!!When Insults Had Class 

* "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." 
-- Winston Churchill 
  
* "A modest little person, with much to be modest about." 
-- Winston Churchill 
  
* "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." 
-- Clarence Darrow 
  
* "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." 
-- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway) 
  
* "Poor Faulkner.  Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" 
-- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner) 
  
* "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." 
-- Moses Hadas 
  
* "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening.  But this wasn't it." 
-- Groucho Marx 
  
* "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." 
-- Mark Twain 
  
* "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." 
-- Oscar Wilde 
  
* "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play.  Bring a friend... if you have one." 
-- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill 
  
* "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one." 
-- Winston Churchill, in response 
  
* "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." 
-- Stephen Bishop 
  
* "I've just learned about his illness.  Let's hope it's nothing trivial." 
-- Irvin S. Cobb 
  
* "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." 
-- Samuel Johnson 
  
* "He had delusions of adequacy." 
-- Walter Kerr 
  
* "He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." 
-- Robert Redford 
  
* "He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame them." 
-- James Reston (about Richard Nixon) 
  
* "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." 
-- Charles, Count Talleyrand 
  
* "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." 
-- Forrest Tucker 
  
* "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." 
-- Mae West 
  
* "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." 
-- Oscar Wilde