Seite - 257 - in Psychoanalytic Perspectives on Puberty and Adolescence - The Inner Worlds of Teenagers and their Parents
Bild der Seite - 257 -
Text der Seite - 257 -
Lost by the wayside – overstepping limits 257
It is very important that people know that there exist such crisis intervention cent-
ers to which friends or family members can be directed. A suicidal crisis can also
constitute a turning point in life and open new possibilities.
There, we attempt to give support where possible, in other words, we
have very close contact to these people who come to us. Thoughts of
suicide do not necessarily mean that the person is truly in danger of com-
mitting suicide. It is often a cry for help and a cry outwards, in order for
something to change in life. These are often very important changes that
are germinated, so to speak – which is also confirmed by the study on the
Golden Gate Bridge, that those are short isolated events and often life can
become very positive, so to speak. . . . One can say that the crisis is a low
point and also a turning point and often, many things can be changed in a
positive direction.
(Ibid, 24)
Tomandl makes clear that a large percentage of adolescents can learn from
their crisis and their mastering it. A crisis is a low point where one can part with
old things and new things can be born. We learn something eminently new about
ourselves, something we probably have never yet experienced.
Every adult who talks with an adolescent about his suicidal crisis can greatly
help him. Nobody should be afraid to speak openly with the adolescent and make
him understand that his life is still in front of him and he has the possibility to
change things, whereas suicide constitutes a definitive end.
Help from friends
Samira Hadaya asked Tomandl what an adolescent can do in order to help a friend
in crisis. Here, his answer:
The most important thing is to give the friend attention, be interested, actively
ask him questions such as “Hey, you just said you don’t want to live any-
more? Tell me what has happened in your life?” Suicidal thoughts do not fall
from the sky without any reason, but always have some origin or catalyst,
a reason somebody has the feeling their life cannot continue further. One
can offer conversation and motivate the person, or consider who else could
be a trusted conversational partner for him. If there are too few people, for
example as with the client I previously mentioned, one can also motivate her,
as in “Hey, I will accompany you to the counseling center for children and
adolescents, for instance this one. I will go with you, I’ll show my interest
and not let you down.” I think that’s the most important message that we want
to hear from our friends when we are in a crisis, that someone is there who
is not indifferent to how we are doing. . . . And often, it’s enough for one or
Psychoanalytic Perspectives on Puberty and Adolescence
The Inner Worlds of Teenagers and their Parents
- Titel
- Psychoanalytic Perspectives on Puberty and Adolescence
- Untertitel
- The Inner Worlds of Teenagers and their Parents
- Autor
- Gertraud Diem-Wille
- Verlag
- Routledge
- Datum
- 2021
- Sprache
- englisch
- Lizenz
- CC BY 4.0
- ISBN
- 978-1-003-14267-6
- Abmessungen
- 16.0 x 24.0 cm
- Seiten
- 292
- Kategorien
- International
- Medizin