Page - 84 - in Psychoanalytic Perspectives on Puberty and Adolescence - The Inner Worlds of Teenagers and their Parents

84 Psychosexual development in puberty Christian. At first we chatted about general matters, then Mrs. Frost reported happily about James’ development: his success at the technical school was very satisfying, and he was organizing his life on his own for the most part. He didn’t go out much, did not have many friends, sat for hours at the computer – but he was very amiable with his family and had no “incidents” anymore. I was glad to hear this, and then reported how I had experienced James in my class. I then related the episode when I showed James a cartoon of Simon’s Cat, in connection with an assignment he had: we both giggled and James became so enthusiastic that he forgot to go home, which he previously said he needed to since he had a headache. Mrs. Frost now eagerly told me how James had down- loaded these cartoons at home and asked her to watch the little film together with him. In an emotional tone of voice, she said this was the beginning of a new kind of relationship between them. From then on, there was step -by -step progress in their family life. With a laugh, she also remembered the time James suggested drawing “nothing” in drawing class. He had never really liked draw- ing, but this idea appealed to him so much that from then on he started drawing “conflated letters” – as she called them – and never again complained about drawing class at school. Instead, from that point on he began to tell more about what happened at school, and actively sought communication with his mother. In a short pause, Christian interjected that they had all had great luck that James had by chance fallen into my “hands”. It seemed to me that his eyes got moist. I was very glad for these appreciative words and answered that “we – James and I – as far as school is concerned and as far as I can tell – achieved an enormous learning process. Just as I told him in my farewell letter to him at the end of the fourth class.” (At that time, I wrote every student in my class a personally encouraging farewell letter, where I also thanked them for the chance at a commonly shared learning process.) With a little smile, Mrs. Frost told me that James had immediately read this letter aloud – even before receiving his diploma – and then had kept it in a safe place. This makes me glad, too. . . . I hope this description has elucidated the path of James’ continued development. Notes 1 The author cannot here describe specific contingencies of masochistic wishes. The mas- ochistic person gives his/her partner a “contract” for designing their painful interactions in order to provide pleasure. The masochist and sadist can assume control by turns: often it is unclear who is fulfilling whose wish, since the “compulsion” to assign this contract is part of the arrangement. 2 In my book Latency – the Golden Age of Childhood (2018), I describe in detail Elfi’s analysis between the years of eight and eleven (132–40). 3 The form of Work Discussion developed by Martha Harris is intended to make psycho- analytic thought useful in work situations (Rustin and Bradley 2008).