Page - 153 - in Psychoanalytic Perspectives on Puberty and Adolescence - The Inner Worlds of Teenagers and their Parents

Lost by the wayside – overstepping limits 153 Discussion A synopsis of B.’s first six years with a mother who left her children alone for days would seem to contrast with his positive assessment of this period on his lifeline. However, we can imagine how many challenges, desperation and fear he had to endure as the oldest of three children. We do not know how many siblings there were at this time and how old they were when he had to look after them, since this data was not collected. Perhaps B. is idealizing this time. Every time he was put in the children’s home is depicted as a low point on the lifeline. His rates his first period in prison as higher than his periods in the homes (possibly, there is less arbitrary violence in prison). The second prison sentence, something he spoke of quite casually in his interview, constitutes the lowest point on his lifeline. He says he misses his freedom, adding that it is now up to him to decide the quality of his future – perhaps the beginning of a new insight. B. traces the first years of his life in the positive area, which he only reaches again (sporadically) between the ages of 10 and 16. B. also spoke about the life- line and the picture he drew. When his mother’s partner moved in, his lifeline descends. During a fight between the mother and partner, B. defended his mother and called the police. The apparent contradiction between the objective fact of B’s massive neglect dur- ing his first ten years of life and his positive depiction on his lifeline demonstrates a common phenomenon: badly abused (including sexually abused), neglected children have a particularly close, ambivalent and dependent relationship to their Figure 6.2 Lifeline as drawn by B. (from Staudner -Moser 1997)