Page - 162 - in Psychoanalytic Perspectives on Puberty and Adolescence - The Inner Worlds of Teenagers and their Parents

162 Lost by the wayside – overstepping limits R’s inner world becomes visible in the following exercises from anti -aggression training. In the third session, R. chooses the rabbit from the four animals meant to show how he feels at the moment. R. goes to the “rabbit corner”, where the participants have cast trainers as “rabbit mothers”. He sees himself as a rabbit, “since I’m good at running away”, and simply “I feel good” – without explaining what he has to run from. When asked to draw a situation in which he is a victim of violence, R. depicts a scene from his family where his stepfather is hitting him. Since Staudner -Moser does not reproduce the actual drawing, it is unclear whether R.’s mother was not involved or he simply omits her. Verbally, he describes the scene with almost the same words he used to describe how his stepfather injured him on the head (when his mother would not call an ambulance); only after he was called up to the prin- cipal at school was the abuse reported to the youth agency. R. took his drawing back to his prison cell, as if this representation carried great significance for him; perhaps this was the first time anyone had taken his feelings about the violence seriously, the first time he could speak about them and feel understood. During the exercise in observing described earlier (in case study B.), R. is not able to detect any change in his partner’s facial expression or posture; frustrated, he thinks he has failed, addressing this in the concluding discussion, whereupon the other participants console and support him. Describing his self -image (as did B.), R. is the unprotected bunny, who only finds safety in flight. It would seem that he has no contact to his violent, criminal side, as if it were completely split off from his mind. His relationship to his mother and stepfather is also unclear. His longing for closeness and maternal protection becomes evident in the twelfth session, when he chooses the seat next to the trainer. In exercises where the focus is on inclusion and exclusion, R. becomes a critic, deriding a “kindergarten game” like musical chairs – and the other participants support him in this. Since their arguments against it are reasoned, the trainer retracts her suggestion. However, concealed behind this derision are massive emotional problems. R. was shut out of his family – he had no place there. His mother could neither protect him nor break with her violent partner. The idea of experiencing such a situation as a game is so painful that R. manages to gain the group’s support for his refusal. In the concluding discussion, R. says he is feeling good. He gained the group’s support and both trainers responded to his arguments, taking them seriously. In the thirteenth session, the group discusses the question of why a child becomes a criminal and whether his family is responsible for this behavior. Now the adolescents begin to tell of their difficult families – parents who beat them, abandonment, stays in homes. They talk about the difficulties that second - -generation immigrant children experience between two cultures and religions. Their dejection and anguish become evident. R. relates: I was abandoned by my father. Papa left me in the lurch. He told me I’m his boy – but he also said he doesn’t need one. He disappointed me terribly. I was